The 69 most common signs of low self-worth - The Self-Worth Experiment

The 69 most common signs of low self-worth

By Dr Berni Sewell | Heal your self-worth

What's your self-worth score? TAKE THE TEST NOW!

Apr 30
The 69 most common signs of low self-worth

​It's odd, isn't it?

When your life just doesn't feel right. When happiness, contentment and fulfilment seem far away.

Yet, you don't quite know why.

Generally, your life isn't all bad. And you feel that you should be happier. That you should be grateful for what you have and make the best of it.

​But too many struggles, anxieties and worries darken your days. Too much negativity circles in your mind. You ​feel unbalanced, out of control. Stuck.

​You have trouble believing in yourself and your own abilities. Somehow, other people always seem ahead of you. More important. Their achievements superior to yours.

We tend to believe that we are born to be socially awkward, a procrastinator, people-pleaser, push-over or under-achiever. We think we are doomed to live with fear and anxiety because of our inherent nervous disposition.

We are convinced that we are condemned to a life of mediocrity, inferiority and "just getting by". That's just what it is.

Not everybody can achieve greatness, stand out, matter. Not all of us are destined for happiness, purpose and abundance.

​Not all of us are good enough. Bad luck, right?

But ​has it ever occurred to you that all of your struggles might just be signs of low self-worth?


The 4 major signs of low self-worth

​Low self-worth affects our life in 4 major symptoms. All of which manifest in a myriad of signs and cause immeasurable suffering every single day.

The thing is though that many of these signs of low self-worth have become so common and widespread that we no longer recognise them as such. We believe that something is wrong with us. That suffering is our destiny. That life just isn't on our side.

When we could transform our life at any point. Simply by healing low self-worth.

So, have a look. Do you exhibit any signs of low self-worth?

The 4 main symptoms of low self-worth

The 69 most common signs of ​low self-worth

​Here is a list of the 69 most common (but often overlooked) signs of low self-worth.

Low self-worth affects everybody differently. And not all signs will apply to everybody. But generally, the more signs you recognise in yourself, the lower your self-worth will be.

If you want to know exactly how much low self-worth affects your life, you can also take the free test: "What's your self-worth score?"

​1. You generally don’t feel good enough

If you suffer from low self-worth, you (wrongly) assume that your worth depends on your appearance, weight, achievements, success, IQ, qualifications, bank balance and what not.

Failure to meet the (entirely arbitrary and unrealistic) standards and expectations of society​ causes a chronic feeling of “not being good enough”.

This commonly results in the following behaviour patterns which are all signs of low self-worth:

  • ​You have problems loving and accepting yourself the way you are
  • ​You criticise and judge yourself regularly
  • ​You expect perfection from yourself at all times
  • ​You wish you could look like or be like someone else
  • ​You struggle with social interactions and often feel overlooked and ignored in conversations
  • ​You exaggerate to appear more interesting when talking to others
  • ​You are easily embarrassed in conversations because you don’t feel important or intelligent enough to contribute something useful
  • ​You feel ashamed of yourself
  • ​You feel uncomfortable with too much attention
  • ​You are unsure how to react to praise
  • ​You are prone to stomach and bowel upsets, especially when you feel anxious
  • ​You struggle financially because,deep down, you feel you don’t deserve an abundant, worry-free, happy life
  • ​You feel awkward asking for what you deserve or charging appropriately for your services
  • ​You tend to sabotage yourself because you subconsciously believe you do not deserve happiness
  • ​You think that happiness, wealth or love are not meant for “people like you”
  • ​You buy things you don't need and your home is filled with clutter
  • ​You frequently demonstrate your superiority to overcompensate for feeling inferior
  • ​You disrespect other people because you have no respect for yourself
  • ​You can be aggressive or abusive towards other people because you believe your own life to be worthless and assume everybody else's is too

2. You don’t believe in yourself and distrust your abilities

​If you don’t know your true worth and live with the core belief that you are not good enough, you will assume that you cannot trust yourself to get anything right.

This will commonly cause the following behaviours as typical signs of low self-worth:

  • ​You value other people’s views and opinions more than your own as you consider them more important than yours
  • ​You have difficulty making decisions and ask everybody you know what they would do in your situation instead of listening to your intuition
  • ​You only believe that your point of view is legitimate if other people agree with you
  • ​You always worry about the potential consequences of your choices and decisions
  • ​You often feel (or are) victimised or bullied
  • ​You tend to procrastinate because, deep inside, you feel that once you start you will fail
  • ​You wouldn’t dare reaching for the stars. They belong to more special people.
  • ​You ​suffer from crippling self-doubt
  • ​You worry that new things you start are automatically destined to fail
  • ​You consider yourself an under-achiever compared to others
  • ​You always expect the worst so you won’t be disappointed when you don’t succeed
  • ​You suffer from anxiety in daily life and unfamiliar situations
  • ​You fear change
  • ​You regularly agonise about the future
  • ​You avoid situations that take you out of your comfort
  • ​You ​tend to abandon your dreams for fear that you don't have what it takes to succeed
  • ​You feel self-conscious and lack confidence in work and during social interactions

3. You need external approval to feel good about yourself

​Feeling worth is a basic human need.

If you​r self-worth is low, if you feel worthless, you will strive to “create” or increase your worth by gaining other people's approval.

You are pleased with yourself if your boss, your family or the random person on the street think you are clever, hard-working, attractive, or successful. You beat yourself up if they don’t recognise your efforts to impress them.

The pursuit of external approval to gain a temporary, volatile sense of worth produces the following behaviour patterns which are all extremely common signs of low self-worth:

  • ​You constantly worry about what other people might think or say about you
  • ​You often feel criticised and get defensive or upset when somebody doesn’t approve of you or your work
  • You don’t ask for help if you are overwhelmed because you worry others will think less of you if you can’t achieve everything on your own
  • ​You believe that asking for help is a sign of weakness in other people’s eyes
  • ​You tend to beat yourself up for things you said or did during interactions with other people
  • ​You replay conversations with other people in your head until you are sure you made a fool of yourself…again
  • ​You ​always prioritise others over yourself because you desperately want to please and help other people no matter what
  • ​You feel that people take advantage of you and don’t appreciate what you are doing for them
  • ​Your relationships often seem one-sided
  • ​You tend to justify your actions, thoughts and feelings
  • ​You often feel unloved and uncared for
  • ​You have nobody to share your true feelings with because people are used to you being the always happy, cheerful and supportive one
  • ​Disappointing other people almost physically hurts you
  • ​You think you should try harder and get more accomplished than you actually do
  • ​You feel lazy and guilty if you take time out for yourself
  • ​You feel self-conscious regarding your appearance, weight or personality
  • ​You have been on every diet that has ever been invented
  • ​You spend a lot of time, money and effort on improving your physical appearance
  • ​You have trouble expressing your feelings towards others because you fear rejection
  • ​You have problems admitting when you are wrong or made a mistake
  • ​When pushed into a corner, criticised or rejected you tend to get angry, react aggressively or bully other people

4. You ​compare yourself to other people

​If you lack self-worth, you will tend to constantly compare yourself to others.

​You obtain a fleeting sense of worthiness if you feel superior or at least equal to other people. While perceived inferiority will result in the conclusion that you are a pathetic loser. Hopeless. Not good enough.

​The relentless comparison of yourself, your accomplishments and attributes to others triggers the following behaviours which are all signs of low self-worth:

  • ​You perceive yourself as smaller and less significant compared to other people
  • ​You feel self-conscious and anxious when meeting new people
  • ​You are shy and uncomfortable around strangers
  • ​You feel intimidated by other people’s achievements
  • ​You consider rich, famous and influential people your superiors
  • ​You love gossip
  • ​​Hearing about other people's struggles, misfortune and messups makes you feel better about yourself
  • ​You ​obsess about finding your purpose and direction so your life will matter
  • ​You ​feel way behind compared to what other people already achieved at your age
  • ​You always try to impress other people
  • ​You tend to criticise and judge other people
  • ​You like to point out other people’s mistakes, shortcomings and flaws

The most effective way to heal your life

Do you recognise yourself in the behaviour patterns above? Do you suffer from low self-worth?

​WHAT'S YOUR SELF-WORTH SCORE?

​Answer 7 quick questions and discover how many of your daily struggles are caused by low self-worth. 

​To be honest, I would be astonished if you didn’t.

The heart-breaking truth is that most of us will suffer from lack of self-worth to some degree. The more of the above signs you recognise in yourself, the lower your self-worth.

And the tragedy is that most people do not realise that their insecurities, anxieties, doubts and fears are caused by lack of self-worth. We perceive them as part of our personality.

We believe they are fixed, inherent traits we need to learn to live with. Our character. What we "just are".

But it's not true! These behaviour patterns are NOT YOU!

The insecure misfit, the substandard write-off, the anxious worrier, the VIP (very inferior person) aren’t you. The stressed out maniac who works 24/7 to gain approval, recognition and appreciation isn’t you! The people pleaser, the notorious saviour, the helpless victim, the bully, the self-concious wallflower, the self-doubting loser...​

​They aren’t you! They are simply signs of low self-worth!​


And these signs will disappear when you ​heal your self-worth. ​They are mere symptoms of a disastrous misunderstanding. A misconception of our society that we absorbed when we were children.

We all believe that we are inherently worthless. That we come into this world devoid of worth and value. And that we have to sacrifice ourselves to the task of accumulating worth as long as we live.

​​But the truth is that worth is the essence of your Being. An absolute, inherent part of your existence. Unchangeable like the number of cells in your body.

You are infinitely worthy. Now and forever. You always have been. Just as every other living being.

Low self-worth fools you into believing that you are worthless. And you behave accordingly.

​And the only true way to overcome the struggle, end the suffering, escape the hardship is to become aware of your true, infinite, inner worth!

You ARE worth.

Nobody else needs to confirm this, nobody needs to recognise your achievements, nobody needs to be impressed.

You ARE worth. Full stop. Just because you are alive.

​Now all you need to do is to remember it.


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About the Author

Dr Berni Sewell, PhD is a health scientist, energy healer and self-worth blogger. She is on a mission to make you feel good about yourself, no matter what. Download her free guide Instant self-worth: an easy 4-step solution to heal your self-worth in under 5 minutes a day” and start to boost your confidence today.